Halloween for Little Munsters!

All year long the kids at Baan Unrak have been bugging me to make Halloween for them...seriously, I think they started asking me last April! There was a volunteer once, many years ago, who arranged for a Halloween themed party in the home (music, dancing, decorations around the home and a costume competition) and the kids absolutely loved experiencing a holiday (nowadays at least) dedicated to candy and ghouls. I decided to up the experience for our kids this year, and create a trick or treating event in our community, "Halloween for Little Munsters!"

I opened the event to all kids in the community, ages 5-12 years old, and recruited volunteers to open their homes for the trick or treating event. There were 5 stations, 65+ kids expected, and more than 20 volunteers from the community who participated in the fun. The volunteers were a mix: from Baan Unrak, from teachers at the government school, from volunteers at the animal sanctuary, and visiting guests from Bangkok. I did a quick fundraising call on my Facebook account, and within 24 hours I was able to raise enough money to buy all the materials necessary for the event: candy (enough for 70 kids); home made costume materials (scissors, glue, garbage bags, glitter, face paints, etc); decorations for the participating homes and fruits/melons to be carved as jack-o-lanterns. 

The 5 stations were themed appropriately for Halloween: 

• Kru Sai and Charlie's Fairyland was a magical land of music (xylophones) and sweet sticky rice treats
• Naomi's house was a games station, where kids had to complete challenges (like pin the spider on the web) before they could snatch the candy booty
• The bakery was converted into a haunted cemetery  where bodies rose from their graves, ghosts popped out of dark hiding spaces and fireworks were thrown at our feet to stop the heart! (Our teenagers were responsible for this station, and they were TOO good at scaring our smallest children!) 
• The Baan Unrak volunteer house was converted into a thriller house, where the kids were chased in thedark by monsters before they could find their candy
• The Baan Unrak school became an evil hospital, where open surgery was performed on live patients and the kids had to drink their sweet blood

It was above, and BEYOND what I had imagined...the volunteers who helped out r eally deserve all the credit for their imagination and creativity. On such a tight budget, they were able to create a night these kids will never forget, the night of all haunted nights in Sangkhlaburi!

Happy Halloween!!!!

"A Paradox" author unknown

A Paradox

"The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years.

We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've split the atom, but not our prejudice. We have higher incomes, but lower morals. We've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of tall men, and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.

It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom; a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to make a difference, or just to... hit delete."

Author Unknown

'Green' Youth Camp: Baan Unrak Goes to the Beach!

We did it! After years of talking about it, months of planning for it and the hard work and energy of several dedicated volunteers (and donors), we successfully brought 14 teenagers from the Baan Unrak Children's Home to experience a once in a life time opportunity: a Youth Volunteer "Green" Camp on the beach! Baan Unrak jungle kids finally got to see the ocean!

 The goal: to provide experiential learning opportunities to disadvantaged children from the Thai/Burmese border town of Sangkhlaburi. 

scenic shot at Jason's beach, aka Ao Nang

The journey: 1100 kms traveled in 2 days from the village of Sangkhlaburi to Krabi. We piled into the back of our school bus and survived the heat, rains and exhaustion of the road trip...but it was all worth it for the smiles we saw that day the kids set foot on the beach in celebration of our arrival!

The kids: These children selected to travel were picked primarily because they have proven to be good role models and leaders in the home, and because teachers and volunteers that directly work with them found them to be hard working and well-deserving of such a wonderful opportunity.

sports day on the beach, kids vs volunteers!

The inspiration: My own life experiences have taught me that an important part of self-discovery can be found in service to others. Life in our little village can be hard and there are limited choices for work and employment...meaning more times than not our kids have a hard time envisioning a future outside of manual labor and government teaching gigs at the local schools.

visit to local tourist attractions

Travel is an escape; an opportunity to experience new environments, new cultures and more importantly travel provides an opportunity to broaden one's horizons when thinking about the future.  The inspiration for this project was to inspire our youth to pursue higher education and to motivate our teens to pursue a higher quality of life than that they currently see as the norm in our poor village.

rock climbing with volunteer guides

 The sponsors: The youth camp was hosted by Projects Abroad Thailand (Krabi) and a special thank you to Ingrid Sprake for inviting our kids to participate and working restlessly to require all the approvals and funding for the camp to be such a great success! Also, thanks to Vishal, Ant, Ruang, Miew and all the community and conservation volunteers from Projects Abroad for creating a warm and welcoming environment for the kids and for making every moment a teachable moment about marine life, coastal conservation, motivation and self improvement.

scuba diving with Thar Gyi

Green Camp: The 'green' camp activities included: beach clean ups; lending a hand planting in a local forest restoration project; recreational art workshops using local resources as inspiration; an introduction to Southern culture Batik painting; marine/coastal conservation workshop and introduction to responsible tourism practices; visits to local heritage sites and temples; an educational mangrove forest walk hosted by government guides; as well as fun interactive games and ice breakers with the team of international volunteers in charge of leading the camp experience!

rock climbing, barefoot!!! jungle style

Adventure Activities: Thanks are also due to individual sponsors and donors for their time, energy and support in providing extra adventure activities: Aqua Vision Dive company for providing the boat, equipment and teachers for a one day discover scuba lesson for our kids; Andaman Sky (and Andy) for providing the equipment and guides for a one day rock climbing adventure course on Railay Beach. Our kids never imagined one day diving under the ocean or experiencing the thrill of dizzying heights and challenging rope work; so special!


The camp was a great moment of achievement for me and for everyone who supported me since the very beginning. I hope this camp marks the first of regular camp and volunteer opportunities for the children at Baan Unrak as well as the children from neighboring home and programs in our small community.

Interested in supporting this project next time?
My website is still in its draft phases, but the donate button works if you're keen to help us out!

Also, check out my Facebook photo albums for all the photos collected from this amazing trip!
Baan Unrak travels to Krabi 
Baan Unrak Green Camp
Baan Unrak Adventure Activities

Mothers on my mind...

Mothers are on my mind a lot these days...This week I have unexpectedly found myself assuming the role of primary care 'mother' for 3 little girls (each of them only 9 years old.)  

Every morning I wake up the girls for 6 am meditation. Following meditation I send them to the children's rooms for bathing and after they've dried and dressed they come back to me for braiding hair, brushing tiny teeth and eating breakfast. Since it's the school holidays they spend the remainder of their day following me around. Where I go, they go. They've spent hours playing outside, watching movies on my computer, and reading Thai lullabies to each other on my small floor mat (as they are doing exactly at this moment.) At night, the teenagers will usually crowd in my room to watch a movie (it's the Star Wars saga this week they're into) and by 10 pm I have to kick everyone out to get the little girls to sleep at a reasonable hour. We enjoy a night-night reading session before it's lights out, a kiss on the forehead each, and a few hours of peace and quiet for me to catch up on my own reading before we do it all over again tomorrow.

How exactly did I find myself responsible for 3 little girls? Destitute mothers, that's how. Here on the Thai/Burmese border, poverty is a daily struggle for both the Thai population and political refugees fleeing Burma. Many parents in this village are simply not able to feed their children, let alone pay school fees that would allow their kids to break this cycle of poverty.  In our home, we offer a solution to break this cycle of poverty (free education for children) and the home provides vocational training, support and opportunities for single mothers to gain employment and sustain themselves along with their children. 

However, for some mothers this is not enough. Some mothers have become so broken and hopeless that they seek only protection in the arms of a man. Jasmine's* mother left for this very reason, last week. After 6 years of living in our home and doing well in her battle against depression, Jasmine's mother snuck out of our home last Thursday, with hardly a goodbye, leaving behind her four children:Jasmine, her older as well as two younger brothers (the youngest only 3 years old.) To make matters worse, and certainly more confusing, she left following not quite a man but a Tomboy (a girl who identifies herself as a man.) 

This has been especially hard on the children, and no one is certain what the future may hold for the mother. Will their family ever be reunited? We honestly don't know. Jasmine has since asked to stay with me, in my room, with the company of two of her best friends. Our sleep over has extended more than a week now, and they're looking to move in full time if I am ready to accept that. Today Jasmine has asked me if she can call me Mom, and I respond with smile and a cuddle each time she talks like this, however I haven't yet quite figured out how best to navigate her emotions nor mine. The little girls are precious and the positive attention I give them every day, well I can see that they have gone a long time without it. I'm happy to give love where I can and certainly to those who are in need, but surely I need to think carefully about what effects my decisions (and these circumstances) will play in my life. It's a waiting game for now...

Yours Truly, 

Stef

* Names have been changed to protect the privacy of our children...

Power Struggles with Teens: A Story & 5 How To Tips

I.Am.Tired. 

If you read my last blog post, you'd know about the computer I found hidden underneath the boy's house. I'm happy to report that we caught the culprits, and in the middle of the investigation caught two other thieving plans before they were implemented! The children were actually digging tunnels, that's right tunnels 2-3 meters long (as in prison break) under the girl's dormitory in the hopes of breaking into the store room. Why the store room? A room full of sweets, snacks, and all you can eat free-dried noodles...well it's a 12 year old boy's dream score. ...It's been a hell of a long week...

Anyways, back to the computer story. There were several boys involved, and my greatest surprise was the young teenage boy involved in splicing the wires to redirect electricity for the computer to function under the boy's house. Evil geniuses they all are; but this  boy I never thought he had it in him to be involved in something like this. The others? Well, I'm not so surprised...they're good children, every single one of them, but they have some seriously bad habits that need to be broken before they get too big for these kinds of games. 

So, this week we called a house meeting. To their credit, every single boy that we knew to be involved in these 'crimes' openly admitted their involvement without denial. And every single one of them accepted their consequences without complaint (hours due working on the farm and cleaning the kitchen after meal times, withdrawn privileges like computer playing time and field trips outside, etc.) Some of these kids will be working off their debt over the next couple months, but the lesson is there...you commit the crime, you pay the time. And more importantly, if you act as an accomplice to crime you are just as guilty. And here is where the real trouble started....

The young boy that spliced the electrical cables wants out. He pulled me aside yesterday to tell me how unfair he thought his punishment was and how he'd rather go back to Burma than face the time, and more importantly the embarrassment. This boy I have a particular love and care for (thus my surprise when we was involved) as his first day here at the Home was also mine, many years ago. I didn't know what to say, didn't know how to react and then it dawned on me...this kid was giving me an ultimatum.

I have made some mistakes in the past when dealing with angry teenagers, and most of these mistakes surround power struggles. I didn't feel like I was engaging in a power struggle yesterday, because it was subtle and passive aggressive, but I did feel trapped. Power struggles with our kids are not so easy and clear to define...the explosive outbursts of anger and temper tantrums are certainly there from time to time, however every once in a while there's an incident like this that comes up where the child engages in a power play that could potentially have much bigger life consequences later on. 

This boy I pulled into a meeting with Didi, our psychologist, a translator, and myself and we spent a very long time discussing options with him. After a lot of talking, and listening, we came to the heart of the matter. The teen is suffering from a lot of pain, as he is starting to make sense of what happened to him as a young boy: physical abuse, abandonment, neglect and relocation. He wants to go back to Burma, but there is nowhere safe for him to go. We did our best to explain how we fight when we love and how we have a duty to teach the children because we care for their development. I told him that he was denying us the opportunity to teach him a valuable life lesson, one he has to learn now while he still can, before the consequences for such an important lesson become irreversible. 

He still thought that he was innocent, merely helping his friends with the electricity since they asked him to. So, we told him a story we had heard recently in town. A man was walking in the rain, along the main road leading out of our village. The rain was exceptionally heavy this day, and a passing motorbike driver felt pity for this man. He pulled over, offered him a lift and carried on to the checkpoints. In the village, life is like this. People are openly trusting; too trusting sometimes. At the police checkpoint, both the driver and the passenger were arrested. The man walking along in the rain was attempting to smuggle kilos of amphetamines, to be sold in the big cities. The driver was convicted to serve the same prison sentence (without bail) as an accomplice to the crime.  He was innocent, and his only defense was that he was lending a helping hand to a stranger in need. But nonetheless, Thai law served him a minimum of 3-5 years. 

Last night we finished our talk with this story, and I looked him in the eyes hoping for some understanding or acceptance...I couldn't see it then, and I can only hope to see it soon. We told him there's no way we can let him pass without consequence. We would be failing him in our duty to teach him, and the other children in our home. 2 months of work is going to disappear quickly, and once over forgotten quickly, but running away and throwing away his education and opportunity for a better future will potentially cause him a life time of suffering. I told him to think about this for 2 days before we talk again about his options. I spent all of last night in tears, second guessing myself and questioning if we were doing the best thing for this child...and for the first time in a very long time I prayed. Prayed for him to see reason, prayed for him to stay, learn and become stronger. 

Power struggles and anger management has been the theme of the month when dealing with our children. I've come a long way since my early days here at the home, and I have learned a few tips for coping with angry kids and how to avoid engaging in power struggles (that almost always left me feeling more broken than the child.) 

• Be consistent: Enforce rules with consistent consequences; allow kids to make decisions and choices clearly knowing the consequences. 
• Stay calm: When kids scream and become disrespectful it is extremely easy to lose your patience. Keep in mind that if you become upset in return, the intensity level of the situation increased. This is often when things are said or done that are not easily forgiven. The goal is to stay calm, and more importantly help the child remain or regain calm. Count to ten, take deep breaths, walk away for a minute or two, talk to a friend before going back to the child again...do whatever it takes to cool down before trying to discipline. 
• Offer choices: Power struggles occur when teens feel a need to regain control. Limits and consequences for their actions might seem reasonable to adults, but for teens they look at the world from an entirely different perspective: looking first and foremost at what others can and can not do (have and have not) compared to them. In this culture loss of face, or embarrassment, is a huge shame. Giving choices (i.e. about their punishment or time for doing punishment) can help them feel a healthy regain of control and help them save face. 
• Stay respectful: Take the high road here and don't 'give what you get.' First and foremost it is important to be a good role model for children, and often that means absorbing emotional blows and rising above them. Words are very powerful, and remember you don't want to run the risk of saying or doing something can that not be undone and potentially harm your relationship for a very long time. Avoid switching the argument to the issue of the child's attitude, this will only diminish the importance of the issue at hand. Address the disrespect another time. 
• Keep consequences realistic: Be sure the punishment matches the crime. Give exact time limits, and if you need to take some time to think clearly before issuing consequence do that, but not too long where the issue diminishes from memory. Ask teens what they think is an appropriate consequence. Enforce these consequences, make sure you follow closely what the child is doing and don't forget to praise them when they behave well in the midst of punishment. Praise them for all the times they are not fighting with you, praise them for listening and praise them for understanding (even if they pretend they don't.) 

If you've got teenagers at home, or by some extremely small chance you're another volunteer at a children's home...well, good luck out there. 

Klepto-boys 1, Adults 0

Yesterday, I found something incredible...Often at the home we have a problem with the teenage boys sneaking out at night. Usually they go to a computer game shop nearby, so it's easy enough to find them and drag them back home. Lately, however the boys have been good. They haven't been sneaking out and things have been quiet...too quiet...

I was taken on a journey yesterday afternoon, the starting point behind the boy's house. Under the stairs there's a hole in the foundation and if you move away the debris, blocks and boards you'll find a man hole (more appropriately named boy hole.) The crawl space is tight, but I was just able to squeeze through. The space under the boy's house is vast, empty and dark so without a flash light I resorted to crawling blindly with my hands sinking through the mud and possibly snake infested terrain (they absolutely love hiding out in dark, cool places!) 

And then, I found the light. Literally, the light from a computer. CPU, flat screen monitor, keyboard, mouse, a comfy bamboo mat to lay on, movies, adapters...and here's the best part, electrical cables spliced from another room and fed through a crack in the concrete flooring to generate electricity for the computer...this computer has been missing for one year already. 

Bravo. Klepto-boys at Baan Unrak 1, Adults 0. For now!!

PS: I left the computer there and have a team of trusted teenagers helping me to find and catch the culprits. This story is not over yet!

Laos, the People's Democratic Republic of SNAFU!

:http://www.visit-mekong.com/laos/shopping.htm 

Every 3 months I have to do a little dance with Thai immigration; a border run where I proceed to the nearest land border, check in with Thai immigration, leave the country for a total of 30 seconds to 3 hours (depending on which country I've entered) and then proceed to live my merry little volunteer life for another 3 months until it's time to do it all over again....This, my dear friends, I have been doing for 5 years already! I've crossed nearly every land border in SE Asia and each crossing leaves me nail biting with nervous fear..."what if they don't let me back into Thailand?" Of course they always have, and will continue to do so as long as I remain an upstanding expat and avoid any trouble with the law, but these days Thai immigration policies are changing, making it harder than ever for visitors to stay more than 2 months at a time...volunteer or not. But, I think that's another blog post for another time.

This week, due to a shortage of time and money I crossed to Laos. Rewind.After a 7 hour windy minivan trip to Bangkok, an overnight train to Nong Khai (that lasted 14 hours due to delay) and a 20 minute tuk tuk bump to the border, I crossed to Laos. After yet another 4 hours in lines for visas, immigration cards and security checks I grabbed a 30 minute local bus across the Thai-Lao Friendship bridge, which would have been a beautiful sight of the majestic Mekong River had I not had my face buried between sweaty bodies and my legs uncomfortably straddling rice sacks in a bus CLEARLY not designed to carry more than 30 passengers (I'd guess there were more than 50 on our bus!)

Absolutely the farthest thing from fresh off the bus, at a bustling bus station in Vientiane, I ventured out for coffee and a baguette (as you do when visiting ex French colonies.) I had exactly 4 hours to kill before I had to trek back to the bridge, pass immigration, cross back into Thailand and catch the 6:30 pm overnight train back to Bangkok. I hopped across the busy avenues, waived off the touts hellbent on selling me tours of the city, dodged motorbikes, rickshaws and buses brimming with livestock and proceeded to a very decayed colonial styled building. The building must have been white at one point in time, but ruin, faulty construction and rain damages stained the walls grey with streaks of cracked black.  Not promising on the outside, however experience has taught me to follow the people. And follow I did to a very pleasant sight for sore eyes, a bustling coffee shop just inside the building's entrance!

This is where I meet Fred. 86 years old, a bit lonely, and eager to chat...with anyone it seems.
"You look lost. Are you lost young lady?"
"Well...not really, I'm not going anywhere today" I replied politely.
"Then why don't you pull up a chair and let me tell you about Laos- the People's Democratic Republic of SNAFU!"
Ooooooohhh...I was instantly hooked!

You see, Fred is a diamond in the rough. He's a WW2 Navy veteran, a captain in his day, who remembers steering scientists to the atomic bomb tests in the Pacific. He's been in and out of SE Asia since 1950, and living as a permanent resident in Laos since 1975. (Check your Lao history, because this was a very turbulent time for most countries in this region.) He talks about the pre-Communist era with a tear in his eye, and refers to the old Laos as 'the last shangri-la.' He also refuses to tell me more about his 4 month sting in a Laos prison in the 1970's, but I'm pretty sure this guy's been an angry fighter for most of his life. He's got all the classic qualities of a lovable grandpa: bushy grey eyebrows; waist high shorts; sharp sense of humor. This combined with all the qualities of a disappointed expat: single; angry at the world; full of criticism towards locals, fellow travelers (well just about everyone); and stories that always start with " I can't remember why I came to this Godforsaken country in the first place...."

The crazy old bat talked my ear off for nearly 3 hours (and only because he bought my coffee and lunch or I would have walked out of him a lot earlier in the conversation.) I listened politely and respectfully nodded and smiled when touches in the conversation deemed it necessary, simply because I have been raised to always respect my elders. Truth be told, I have a love/hate relationship with expats like him. Love to hear their stories of what life was like 30-40 years ago in Asia (like when he remembers the Bangkok where you truly could travel only by boat through its complex network of canals and where floating markets was the only way to get your food for dinner) but I hate to hear them bitch and moan about their anger towards locals and local governments. At one point during his speech, he actually pointed to a group of small school girls (10 years old max!) and looked me in the eye saying "these poor girls, I feel so sorry for them, absolutely no future for them." When I ventured back with "you never know, policy can change, economies can grow quickly" he shot me down with a stern look and a lecture that started with "listen here, Missy..." I can't remember the rest, I tuned out. Every time I was ready to walk out on him, he'd reel me back in with stories about the Great War and the developing days of Bangkok when the current king of Thailand came to throne.

After my 3rd black Lao coffee, thick with a creamy mass of condensed milk sticking to the bottom of my glass (pictured above) I asked him point blankly why doesn't he just go home? "I have no money, I couldn't afford to live in American again." And there it is my friends, the same story time and time again for nearly every single expat I have ever met living in Asia. Also, my worst fear. Let's hope this isn't my story in the years to come, and let's hope I have a little more grace the next time I sit down to chat to a stranger.

To all of you self righteous expats out there who have a lot of opinions and complaints, and provide very little help or movement to the communities you're living in...well, Fred suggests you just go home before it's too late.

Cheers from Vientiane,
Laos- The People's Democratic Republic of Situation Normal All F*ed Up!

The perfect getaway, Phuket with Queenie!

Pristine (clean!) sandy beaches, shades of green mountains on the horizon, crystal blue waters, bassa nova soundtrack singing softly in the background, margarita in hand, trashy vampire novel baking on the chair, sand speckled toes, the rush of heat to my skin as I step into its golden sun, the low tide's baby waves rushing past my ankles, joyous laughter of babies and puppies crashing sand castles, the smell of grilled breads and fresh fry from the seafood counter teases my nostrils, and the cool cool waters penetrate my core when I duck my head under the crashing wave and touch the sandy bottom sea with my fingertips...heaven, I am in heaven.

It has been too long since I've had a proper beach day, not since Mom came for her visit and we crashed in Koh Lanta for one week...now already 4 months ago!

This is actually where Queen lives, if you can believe it! She is renting a condo in tropical paradise, a stone's throw from the beach shore and only a 5 minute motorbike ride to the public beach pictured above (Bangtao Beach.)

Queen, being the very best friend in the world she is, bought me a return flight to Phuket to come and visit her this weekend and celebrate her fabulous news: pregnant and marriage on the way! About time she's met someone willing and able to provide for the life she has always deserved...the life fit for a Queen!

This mini-getaway could not have come at a better time for me, I've been worked to the bone and while I love my life, love my work and my passions for Baan Unrak...sometimes I forget to stop and enjoy the sunsets...so here I am, right now, enjoying one of the most amazing sunsets I have seen since Mom has come to visit me all those months ago...

"Don't hurry, don't worry.You're only here for a short visit.So be sure to stop and small the flowers."Walter Hagen

The day we met Jackie Chan

It's been a while since I've updated this blog, more due to the fact that there's been nothing interesting to write about than me not having enough time to sit down and blog...Sure things have been happening, some events more exciting than others, but all in all I've been getting into a steady rhythm enjoying my life to the fullest here as a full time volunteer at the Baan Unrak Children's Home. 

The most dramatic change for me this  month has been the change of role for me here at the Home. I am now the Volunteer Coordinator of Baan Unrak, a position I neither desired nor expected during the course of my stay here...however, there was a last minute need for a replacement and I was left with little choice but to accept and assume its responsibilities. This change of role has actually turned my life upside down and I spend more hours in the day navigating through emails, volunteer task schedules, sponsor communications, project and fundraising proposals, than I ever imagined I would sitting in a cubicle working the 9-5 grunt route!  

My commitment to the children has not wavered in the least, so I still wake up first thing to send them off to school and make sure I shut down all jobs and computer work by the time they return from school. It makes for long days now, when after school I am running private tutoring sessions and homework help for those who ask, and in the evenings I'm usually spending quality time with the girls and Thar Gyi. Weekends, well they're still as busy as ever...just ask my friend Jason if you ever doubt how busy and chaotic my life has become, surrendering all of my free time to the needs of 100 + children!

This weekend was particularly exciting, as a few of our lucky kids got the opportunity to meet a living action icon, Jackie Chan! Jackie's charities have expanded to include the Dragon Hearts Foundation Thailand. Dragon Hearts wants to offer relief to orphanages, needy children and elderly in rural villages throughout Thailand; Baan Unrak may very well become a beneficiary of his good will! 

For more information about Jackie Chan's charity work visit his foundation website  and for a press release on his recent visit to Bangkok (where you can see more beautiful photos of our kids!) please visit 'Bringing Aid to Thailand.'  

Our kids survived the 7 hour heated, long journey to Bangkok, in the bed of a tired pick up truck, and never complained once. We packed 20 children, ages 6-16 years old,   and had to stop often because of motion sickness and small bladders...but it was all worth it in the end! Their beaming smiles and excited chatter when Jackie first appeared will be something we will all cherish in the years to come. 

To think, this famous action star called them, sought them out because he thought they were special, well that's just mind blowing for these kids! We spent less than 48 hours in Bangkok (the kids have school to get back to!) but we filled our time with good company, good food, 'The Amazing Spiderman' cinema experience, and best of all...free plastic Chinese fans for souvenirs. 

Thanks for the happy, Jackie!

-Stefanie

Guest Blogger: Mom Visits Cambodia

As promised, Mom's third (and final) blog post about her recent visit to Thailand; this story covers our last week together, traveling to ancient temples in Siem Reap, Cambodia. 
-Stefanie

The flight into Siem Reap is gorgeous, green fields, laid out in perfect geometry, thatched buildings raised on poles dotting the landscape, forests on hillsides beyond the fields. For this plane ride we had perfect, clear weather for a perfect ride and landing. The airport is modern and spotless, tourists from every nationality imaginable stood in line with us to get the tourist visa. We took a taxi to our hotel which was about a 20 minute ride on a wide highway with practically no traffic. Next time, Estefania, we’ll take a Cambodian tuk tuk from the airport, just like we did on the way back to our flight back to Bangkok.

The Angkoriana Hotel was perfect! Its architecture is Khmer inspired, I think, with the use of rich woods throughout. I especially liked the carved 10 foot high room doors and the rich wooden staircase and carved banister that took us up to our room on the second floor. Estefania, you make the best traveling arrangements!

From that moment on, all our transportation needs were on tuk tuk, Cambodian style, nothing fancy, just a motorcycle pulling a little wagon with 2 tiny bench seats and a canvas roof – but absolutely perfect.

We tuk tuked down the Charles de Gaulle Boulevard at sunset towards the center of town and to its night markets and restaurants. The ride on the wide boulevard bordered by giant overhanging trees, the river on the left, motor bikes, tuk tuks, a few cars and trucks sharing the road was…..again……perfect. I followed Stef’s lead as we strolled through the streets and bazaars and ended up going up a couple of flights of stairs to an outdoor restaurant where I left all the ordering to Stef. Comida super deliciosa! I’m not very good as describing flavors and tastes, but I can say that Cambodian Kmer food is even spicier than Thai! Ouch!

 We planned on investigating the temples for two days, so from the hotel we hired a Cambodian tour guide. His name was Dom and we spent 2 days in his company. We 3 climbed into a tuk tuk at the hotel and he began laying out the itinerary for the first day. He was very nice and knowledgeable and after guiding us to the park entrance (which had incredibly long lines of tourists) he began to explain as much as he could about the carvings, the entrances, the sculptures, the temple levels, the Hindu and Buddhist stories, and the forest that surrounds Angkor.

We avoided the huge crowds as much as possible as we walked over causeways and climbed multi-chambered hallways all the while (for my part) gazing with awe at wall carvings and paintings, mythical Naga beasts and Apsara dancer sculptures, columns, lintels, vaulted rock ceilings, limestone, sandstone, imagining a kingdom of one million working on these gigantic monuments over eight hundred years ago. I’d go back in a heartbeat.  What a privilege, Stefanie, to be able to touch these same carvings with my own hands and climb a hundred narrow steps to view the expanse of this project with my own eyes! De veras, Stefanie, un muy profundo – graciassss!

 Enough, I think, the Angkoriana Hotel lobby with its rich wood columns and super throne like comfy sofas is making me forget that I will say good-bye to Estefania…….but hello to the rest of the family. Adios, but I really must follow through and plan my trip to the ancient monuments of Egypt with my fantastic travelling companion, Stef.

-Guest blogger: Cecilia Langley (Mom) 

Guest Blogger: Mom visits Thailand, Koh Lanta Paradise

It's taken weeks to get my mother to finish writing about her experiences traveling with me...but alas, the final two posts about our trip to the southern island Koh Lanta and Cambodia. Enjoy!
 - Stefanie

Querida familia y amistades:

So, the island beach days in Koh Lanta were amazing. But first we had to get there going via Kanchanaburi and Bangkok. Stef and I arrived in Kanchanaburi (Bridge over River Kwai city) after another kind of scary bus ride down from the mountains of Sanghkla. I can’t describe the bus ride’s views from their big windows because the road turns so often: first it’s a lake, then it’s a huge forest scraping (almost) the sides of the bus, then it’s a cluster of roadside stands selling mango, pineapple. And the bus drivers OWN the very narrow road, they go at outrageous speeds, swerve around cars on curves and glue their hands to the horn to make cars move out of their way.  Estefania, I don’t know how you have done this more than once in your life! 

We spent the afternoon walking to the bridge on the river, trying to get service on a floating restaurant – the waiters and waitresses totally ignored us, but at least we got to feel the super swift  river current rushing underneath the barge, right, Stef?  Steve has always been a fan of the 1957 WWII movie so we shopped for postcards, walked the still functioning railway bridge, evaded large groups of tourists from all over Asia and Europe, took pics, read the placards that described the unimaginable human suffering of the forced laborers, the usual tourist stuff.  

I always felt so far away from home and was constantly seeing myself clear across the other side of the globe, but not so for Stef.  Before sitting down to the most delicious meal of rice, Thai omelet and Thai sweet and sour pork and veggies in a restaurant right by the bridge, the owner of the restaurant came up to Stef to greet her like an old friend and I was once again introduced as “my mom”. She’s been there quite a few times with her student groups. 

We walked back to our hotel, about 15 minutes and were up the next morning ready to catch a tuk tuk to the bus station. We couldn’t get tickets on the “big” bus and ended up in a small van, Stef sat in the third row between two guys, I was stuck in the middle next to an older gentleman and his 2 large bundles, as the ride progressed he gradually took up more and more of the shared seat…………I know it’s because he fell asleep and raised his feet onto the seat so he could cushion his shoulder against the window. Stef’s fellow passengers got off several stops before Bangkok, so she was really quite comfy, what luck! This time, from the bus station in Bangkok we took a taxi to a hotel near the airport. Stef actually went out to eat, I crashed. 

Next day….Air Asia to Krabi and then a van ride and 2 ferries to the southern part of the island of Koh Lanta. Paradise, long beach, soft sand, beautiful view of the ocean and the mountain rainforest behind us. Our hotel room was a little bungalow with covered porch and ocean view. Every day we woke up to “surfy” sounds and chirping birds.  Actually I did spend an insane amount of time just lounging on our front door porch, drink in hand, kindle going, just listening, reading and thinking. 

Our morning routine included walking a few meters to coffee and breakfast in the outdoor area overlooking the pool and sea. We were always surrounded by very agreeable Swedish family groups of abuelos, their children and the grand kids. Perfect for an old abuela like me. Dios mIo! I’m getting to be such an old something or other, agreeable is just another word for kind of quiet, relaxed, no shouting and children who never complained or whined. We found out later that the Swedish International School was right next door.  I swam in the ocean at least twice a day, went into the pool daily, the weather was HOT but one afternoon it rained and the sound was magical and the smells beautiful – I watched this from the porch, of course. This part of the Andaman Sea is hard packed (but not too hard) reddish sand. 

 You can walk out, seems like forever, and never lose touch with the sandy bottom. The water is clear and just perfect. No reef nearby or animals to see but perfect for swimming and floating while gazing at the rocky islands across the horizon. Stef and I walked down the beach our first day after we unpacked and went swimming, found a pair of the reclining sofa chairs with triangular pillows that seem to cover Thai’s beaches, ordered our drinks and just watched the sunset. Stef, this is a bit much! Too many mother-daughter moments, ha! We took pictures of the food, Stef took over the ordering, but one night we had Hawaiian pizza, the pineapple in this area of the world is SO sweet. 

 Queen happened to be on the same island staying in the northern part with 2 Australian friends.Queen had wheels! She picked us up and went from the southernmost point of the island to the northernmost. We had lunch at a hillside restaurant looking down a most amazing ocean view – Queen, thanks again for the lunch but that was supposed to be my treat! Queen and Stef have known each other for years, and their conversation reflects that. They gossip and tease and cavort as only 2 sisters can! Thank you, Queen for being such a good friend to my little “bebe”. We stopped again in Old Town Lanta and did a little strolling and peering into stalls and stores. Stef claims that the statue of the goddess (Chinese Buddha of Mercy) we saw in the Chinese stores is the same one I have at home, but the bottom of mine says “porcelana de Cuernavaca, Mexico” although she is holding a lotus flower in her hand and appears to be standing on a pedestal surrounded by lotus.

  Then we took off again on the scenic route toward a Sea Gypsy village. We took pics, of course, but the atmosphere was just so nice being with my 2 (forgive me Queen, but I had to “adopt” you) girls. Of course, their love for animals or anything in need of help had to be a part of their day. Just as we got in the car, both Queen and Stef literally bolted out of the car in an attempt to rescue a little dog that was on the side of the road with its head stuck in something. I, of course, was “muy miedosa” and could only hope that the dog hadn’t been tied up because it was sick or rabid. Well, the village was quiet and though there were some people about, the atmosphere was very laid back. Queen went on to knock on a few houses to inquire of the owners of the dog, then came back when she couldn’t find answers. It turns out that the silly puppy, whose mother we realized was lying down in the shade just on the other side of the road, was just too dumb to figure out a way to loosen the can around its snout. Stef and Queen let it go and waving its tail it sauntered off to drink some water next to its mama. We had a good laugh about that one! Poor Queen, she ended up driving all day as she brought us back to our hotel and later that night picked us up to take us to the north again to dine at a gorgeous hotel where Queen,  and her friends were staying.

Beautiful surroundings, beautiful sunset, the girls jumping up and posing for action photos with the ocean behind them, it was fun! I don’t know about you, nignas, but I think the honeymooning couple next to our table weren't in the mood for our laughing! Too bad, the food was good, we all tasted each other’s choices, and I hope that Queen's friends do continue to be interested in Baan Unrak and somehow sponsor a child. A few hours later, Queen drove us back south, again. Graciasss, Queen you have a very generous spirit. Thank you for sharing your beautiful country with us. Besos y abrazos!

Forward a couple of days, lying on the beach, eating delicious food, just relaxing. Then, back to a van, waited in line to cross from island to island on 2 ferries, took the four lane highway to Krabi Airport (it was packed, jammed with tourists!) and back to Bangkok. Chris and Chas, I agree with Stef that this is the island to visit on your next honeymoon. You can lounge but also party, snorkel, whatever. The plane ride from Krabi to Bangkok was super scary. We roller coastered through a thunderstorm. I don’t know what Stefanie did, but I just closed my eyes during the entire flight. Tight!

Retired after 37 years as an educator and what a ride it’s been! It’s true that when you look back all you remember are the kids and the wonderful aha moments (some of them with parents!) You have to be a teacher to really understand. After my first year of teaching in Texas, when I was about to decide to change to another profession, my sister Rocio and I took a trip to Southeast Asia. It was loads of fun and Rocio and I still laugh about “the beautiful statue you must buy, ONLY THE BEST PRICE FOR YOU! … the price kept going lower and lower the longer we walked”. 

 But, Angkor Wat was on the itinerary and suddenly cancelled due to Khmer Rouge hostilities. I am still fascinated by the ancients and their buildings and loved teaching about them, so this trip I had to come to Siem Reap for the temples of Angkor, especially the biggest of them in the whole world, Angkor Wat...

-Guest Blog post written by: Cecilia Langley (Mom) 

Stay tuned for Mom's next guest blog post: Siem Reap, Cambodia!

Not for me, but for my children...

Posing at Doi Suthep temple, the iconic landmark of Chiang Mai

Right now I feel like I have accomplished something great in my lifetime; at a time when every official said "No", I chose to follow my heart and do something crazy (slightly dangerous) driven by knowing the simple truth that it was the right and just thing to do...not for me, but for my children.

I don't want to get into too much detail here, but at the end of a long week of "No's" and "Never will non-Thai children travel freely in Thailand", I decided, with locked jaw and stubborn determination, to take a small group of children with me to Chiang Mai for one week of tourist holiday and educational fun.

I had full support from the Home (and founder) since she understood my frustration. "Stefanie, if I listened to everyone who told me "No" in this lifetime, I would not have the children I have today and I would not be who I am today..." I felt a surge of resistance and fight in my veins, something stronger than me that I never could imagine before....

getting chic haircuts for free thanks to Queen's friends

 We were invited by Lek, founder of Elephant Nature Park, to visit her elephant conservation project, and this has been a life's-dream accomplished for me...finally after years of thinking of (and fundraising for) this moment, I was able to get my kids to her park! They learned so much about elephant conservation, and the tears streaming down their cheeks when they heard some of the elephant stories makes me hopeful that one day they will look back and share how that educational experience impacted them.

 They had plenty of other great experiences: enjoying the hustle and bustle of a city (quite the shock compared to our dusty village); meeting new friends and smiling faces; exploring new sites (temples, waterfalls, national parks and botanical gardens to name a few); all the while experiencing what it truly feels like to travel  in their own country. They traveled by train for the first time in their lives, and they lived like kings and queens in a hotel resort (complete with swimming pool!); such luxury they never imagined for themselves having grown up in an environment where sleeping on the floor is all they've ever known.

exploring the jungle waterfalls outside of Chiang Mai city

 As far as I'm concerned, these kids are Thai. They have lived here for most of their young lives; they're enrolled in the Thai government school system; and they communicate freely in Thai with each other since it is the common language for each of them despite their ethnic backgrounds. They deserved this opportunity just as much as any other Thai national, and I intend on fighting every time someone tries to tell me "No" again.

These kids learned so much, and they met so many inspiring individuals (tour guides with similar backgrounds; founders of organizations fighting similar causes for Burmese minorities) and they learned so much about themselves too...I could see the little lights going off behind their eyes as they expressed dreams of studying in Chiang Mai, and pursuing higher education outside of our small village.

at Elephant Nature Park

First and foremost I have to thank TJ. He's only 15 years old, but he is the driving force behind this journey, since I  promised nearly 2 years ago to bring him to Chiang Mai. I'm so happy I could keep that promise.

Before we left Bangkok, I had a moment where fear overcame my senses...TJ responded to my fear, and in a teary mess he cried and begged me to go back home. I asked him why, and he said only that he didn't want anything bad to happen to me. "If something happens to you Stef, I will have no one again."

I looked him in the eyes and asked him "Do YOU still want to go?" His small nod was all I needed to tell him we were going and no one was going to stop us. After that all my fear melted away, because it had to. I found inner strength buried deep in my love for TJ, and I knew whatever the risk, this was likely to be his one and only opportunity to travel before he got too big for people to look the other way.

In the end, I did this all for him. I love him so much I'm willing to risk all for his happiness, now and forever. This kind of love is scary, and humbling. He's started calling me 'Mom' recently, and while my heart swells each and every time I'm also very aware that I am bound to him for the rest of his life...Our bond has stolen me.  I don't know how many more happy months (or years) we will have together in our Home, but I do know that even when he is old and married I will always be nearby, watching over him as long as he needs me to.

I have to thank all of my friends and family who pitched in for this adventure; I really could not have managed the costs of transport and accommodation on my own, so from the bottom of my heart I thank you all so much for putting your faith into my love for these kids.

Notes from an IPOD

Thoughts from a high school auditorium...

Udomsitthisuksa High School, April 2012:

Today is going to be a good day. My alarm went off at 6:40 am and I was out of bed at exactly 7 am, (I'm a 'two alarms until I get up' kind of snoozer.) After washing my face and brushing my teeth I looked dismally at my ever decreasing bucket of fresh water, and worried for just a moment what I was going to do when it runs out...3 days already without water at the Home since our pump is being repaired...oh well, I guess there is absolutely nothing I can do about that situation except grin and bear it along with all the other kids who can't bathe and hope for a trip to the river soon!

When I finished filling my thermos with 'instant' coffee I leaned out of the big wooden double-door windows in my room that look out over the vegetable gardens and kids' dining area and enjoyed the unobstructed view of sunrise climbing over the mountains. As I started to lock up I caught a glimpse of two small boys fighting over something in the car park below me... Not today boys, somebody else is going to have to break that up!

After locking the stairwell door that leads to my room I jumped as someone tapped on my shoulder! Of course it was only Lochoy, waiting for me patiently, as today was a big day for him. Two nights ago he asked me to attend a graduation ceremony for him at his high school and to be his official photographer. He's reminded me every day since, so here I am. Now already 8:30 am, siting in an auditorium waiting for his grand entrance with the rest of his classmates. It occurs to me that I have attended every one of his school rallies and performances over the past 7 months and his teachers and peers smile at me in recognition. It also occurs to me that Lochoy wants me here, not just for my camera, but to be a warm body in a seat reserved for his family and friends.

To be honest I have absolutely no idea what is going on around me. The auditorium is decorated with rich purples and golds and there are flower bouquets neatly arranged along the center stage. There is a very pregnant teacher behind me stacking books on a table at the entrance, and that's not going to help because I can't read a word of Thai script yet. I think, this is a ceremony for undergrads becoming upperclassmen because I am sure Lochoy has another few years of schooling left before he finishes high school...hmm. Never mind, he's asked me to be here for him and that's all that's really important.

Living in a small village, I'm used to getting a lot of attention as a foreigner, however I have never once felt unwelcome because of it. Lochoy has just run up to hand me his backpack with a great smile on his face as he yelled 'I passed, I passed!' Yay! I know he's passed his exams and will move on to the next grade now, I certainly felt a surge of pride just now. My little brother passed today!

The ceremony starts, the headmaster of the school delivers each student an individual certificate of honor and the 'prim and proper' ceremony reminds me how grateful I am to be done with this chapter of my life. I laugh at these high schoolers pulling chairs out from their friends when the headmaster's not looking; defying their teachers who continue to 'shush' them quite unsuccessfully; tucking and untucking their uniforms, and spiking their hair in case the cute girl in the back row is watching.

Nowhere else I'd rather be on a bright, Friday morning...

Sent from Stefanie's IPod